Being single. . .

. . .and 35, I've had a couple of friends urge me to sign up for one of the online dating services, which I've always resisted -- and it turns out, for good reason.

After filling out seemingly interminable personality profiles for both eHarmony (at the behest of The Corner at NRO) and Conservativematch.com, I've come up with exactly ZERO matches. Even after manipulating my search criteria to include matches within 500 miles, I've gotten not a single match.

This convinces me that either I'm uniquely unsuited for personal relationships, or that online dating services are full of crap. I mean, how else do you explain the fact that, out of thousands upon thousands of registered users, not one of them comes close enough to compatibility to even warrant being listed as a potential, if not particularly likely, match?

One of these days, I'll treat readers to a manifesto on male/female relationships.